Liberation of Less

Posted by Laura

When I was preparing to leave America for Germany, I knew that I would not be able to take everything with me. I had a bed, a futon, a dining table and chairs, a papasan, and three bookshelves filled with over two hundred and fifty books - not to mention my closet overfilled with Toms shoes and cardigans. The furniture and clothes weren't terribly hard to get rid of, though I felt a little more like I was parting with pieces of my soul as I sold books back to Powell's, the greatest bookstore on the planet. One day as I unloaded two bags full of books at the book buyer's desk, I was explaining to the woman examining them that I was culling all my possessions to fit into three suitcases as I moved overseas. My goal was to leave next to nothing at my parents (though I did end up spreading out a few boxes of books among my friends for safekeeping because I couldn't bear to part with too many).

"Isn't it liberating?" She asked.

"Yeah," I responded with a rush of enthusiasm for someone who finally got it.

"Yeah, a few years back, I tried to do something similar. I don't own anything more than I can fit in my car so I can pick up and move anywhere anytime. It just feels great to have so much less."

I totally understood what she was saying when I stood there still holding on to loads of my books and possessions though I would have serious struggles in the coming weeks as my diminishing possessions gave me an increasing sense of rootlessness. I was untethered by things which, yes, was liberating, but also a little frightening.

Actually getting down to three suitcases was tough. It was even tougher emotionally when Sarah saw the three suitcases and bluntly told me, "Oh, honey, we're getting this down to two," the night before I moved to Germany. Five hours and a trip to Target later, I was repacked with everything I would own in Europe in two checked bags, a duffel, and a backpack. Emotions would get even higher at the airport when the duffel had to be left behind with a few items shoved into the other suitcases and backpack.

Not surprisingly, it didn't take me long to accumulate loads of useless items - as well as some very necessary items like my $60 mattress that feels like a dream. It's just stuff though. Except for a few books and gifts, I could bear to part with everything and survive just fine. The conversation with the book buyer at Powell's years ago gave me a twinge of rootlessness, but now, I realize the roots aren't in things anyways. The roots I have in Portland will forever be rooted though not always in Portland; they are people. People are my roots across the globe no matter where I live, so my things don't really matter and needn't keep me any place in particular. I really want to hold on to that freedom that I can pack up everything I own in two suitcases and move anywhere. A coworker in the states told me before I left that she was so happy for my upcoming adventure and slightly jealous that she couldn't ever do that because she was married.

As Mimi sings in Rent, "I'm looking for baggage that goes with mine." I don't think this lifestyle locks me into singleness, and I don't think that being married chains me to a location. Loads of couples and families have moved here to Germany or other locations for reasons similar to mine. At the moment, though, I'm just embracing the liberation of less.