Posted by Laura
The catchy quote for the title is not mine. Credit belongs to Joss Whedon though the context is not particularly relevant to what I want to write about. (However, the English teacher in me insists upon full disclosure: the first time this line is said, it's an older sister about to sacrifice her life for her little sister. She encourages her sister to be brave and live, then she goes and dies. In my opinion, it robs the sentence of it's power just a little bit. However, the line is repeated once the sister is resurrected and little sis slams it back to big sis spiraling in bad post-resurrection decisions. There it holds a little more weight.)
Returning the focus to realistic implications of the statement, sometimes it is hard to live in this world. Getting out of bed and going through the routine of life is exhausting not to mention difficult and painful.
I had some rough moments this week as I had bills to pay, insurance claims to file, and medical issues to take care of. I felt pretty alone in it as I didn't have anyone to do it for me. As I laid alone in my bed last night, I watched a couple episodes from the Whedonverse to take my mind off the fact that no one else could solve my problems. I realized, though, that everyone has problems to solve on their own - even the people who live with someone else. I have personal responsibility for my life, and that comes with a lot of pressures and frustrations, but it also comes with a lot of liberty and rewards.
Yesterday was heavy with the weight of the world, but I lived through it. I made it through yesterday, got out of bed today, and was rewarded with a delicious cup of coffee in the morning. Man, I had this incredible dark cup of coffee - Longbottom Portland roast - that made getting out of bed worthwhile. It was a treasure. I also had a great conversation with a student at lunch. I live for the moments where I can positively impact lives, and I got to share with this kid how incredibly grateful I am to be here as her teacher, how even though the road to get here has been tough, it's so worth it.
Tonight before I go to bed, I'll watch another show from creator Joss Whedon because there's no one here to stop me. I'll get help translating my new bills or picking up my prescriptions later this week because I'm not living alone in this world, and as hard as it is, I'll find more rewarding moments like the conversation I had today. It'll be hard, but I'll be brave and live in the world tomorrow.
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