The Only One in the Middle of the Street

Posted by Jordyne

It's crazy how time gets away from you. I had no idea it had been over a month since I last wrote. I feel like I've spent these last few weeks doing nothing but processing and evaluating my life and sifting through emotions. Basically, the reason it took me so long to write this post, is because it takes a long time to type out 4 weeks worth of messy, over-analyzed thought. But now I can finally share it with you. Grab a cup of tea and get comfy...

Just kidding. I would not put you through that. I actually just want to tell you a couple seemingly unrelated stories.

A few days after my last post, I got the chance to go to Denver and spend four days with Rachel. It was magical. I had no idea I needed to get away so bad (Rachel did though. She’s good at picking up on things like that.) 

I also got to meet her two roommates. One night we were all hanging out in the living room, and there was this conversation going on where we were all laughing and animated and talking over one another. All at once it just hit me how long it has been since I had been with a group of women who were all in the same place in life as I am: All single Christian women, never married, no children.

It was liberating. 

“These are my people!” I thought to myself. I had forgotten what it felt like and how much I needed it.

As mentioned before, I live in a small town. When I was making the decision to move here two and a half years ago, the thought crossed my mind that choosing to live here would almost certainly mean I would never get married. 

I mean...there’s no one here. 

My first few months here, I couldn’t get over the fact that I could drive down the street and actually be the only car on the road. 

Now I make the most of it by regularly driving down the middle of the street like I own the place. 

But anyways, back to my point: I am literally the only single, never-married woman with no children in my church. And I am sure there is at least one other woman who is in that same category in this town, but I have yet to meet her.  

I’m an endangered species around here.

The first couple days back home after being in Denver were rough. I kept thinking “I’m the only one left!” But after the second or third time I said that out loud, it reminded me of Elijah whining the same words.

Elijah had just finished hosting an epic showdown between Baal and Yahweh. 
Spoiler alert: Yahweh won. (You can read about it in 1 Kings 18) 

After Baal lost, Elijah ordered that all of the prophets of Baal be killed. This made Queen Jezebel furious, and she promised to kill him. Even after witnessing the incomparable power of Yahweh, his God, he ran for his life. 

God asked Elijah, "what are you doing?" I think that's a fair question in this moment. How could he be in such a negative, fearful state so quickly after experiencing something so awesome? I am asking myself the same question.

“I’m the only one left!” he cried, “and now they’re trying to kill me too!” (1 Kings 19:14) 

 It’s a strange comparison, I know. How many things does a single girl in a small town have in common with a prophet in ancient Israel? Not many it would seem. I’m not running for my life, and the comparison quickly breaks down if you try to look at it too closely, but I kept coming back to this story.  

What Elijah lacked was perspective, and the gentle whisper of the Lord gave him the much needed reality check. As soon as he heard from the Lord, his situation didn’t seem so dire anymore. He was able to pick himself back up and get to work.

I love that God didn’t call him a baby or tell him that he shouldn’t feel the way he did. He simply presented Elijah with the truth; showed him reality. That’s all that was necessary. 

I highly doubt that I will discover 7,000 women in this little town that God has placed in the same situation as me, but it does make me anticipate what he will reveal with his still small voice. There’s a bigger picture I can’t see yet. But I will soon enough. He’ll show me when the time is right.